:Photos:

My name is Sam, and I dislike being in photos.

Forget forcing a smile-- I dislike being in photos, period. I'm not exactly sure why, but it's the truth.

Maybe it's a learned behaviour, going back generations in the family; something I picked up from my Mother's Father...who also avoids photos at all cost. His philosophy? If I'm paying for photos, then I'll sit, and smile, and take nice photos. If not, why am I taking photos? Everyone that matters knows I'm here, and remembers that I was at this or that event...

Maybe it's a survival tactic--an avoidance method perfected over the years and years of dealing with relatives who, whenever they have a camera within arms' reach, constantly call for those in the room to pose or look at the camera, rather than engaging in the wonderful world that is "candid photography". I mean, really, does anyone look for a camera when they're holdding a conversation, just so they can look at it? Nope. So if I'm looking at a camera for a posed shot that is supposed to be an accurate representation of the enjoyable evening I just shared discussing pretzel prices in Peru, it has already failed at its mission. Sad. Such a short lived mission, too.

Maybe it's related to a self-image issue (or is it an accurate reaction?), due to how I feel I look in said photos...my nose is a funny shape, my teeth are crooked, and I'm tall and thin as a GUMBY on growth hormones. Obviously, if I was as dashing as Joseph Gordon-Levitt, or as tempting as Chris Hemsworth, I'd take my shirt off and prance about in front of the camera, or suit up and strut my stuff wherever I figured the nearest camera would be. But I'm not, so I tend toward the side of the population that doesn't seem destined to appear sexy in every single photograph taken...and therefore tends also toward seeing oneself as at least somewhat un-photogenic.  

My wife says that all of this doesn't matter. 

Now, I should clarify this, and say that by this statement, she's not saying that my thoughts or opinions are invalid or pointless, or that I might not have a realistic perspective in any or all of these areas (although I like to think she finds me as gorgeous as any of the men above)...she's simply saying that these photos are important. It's a documentation method. Turns out, the fact that my parents took a thousand photos a day of me as a baby didn't mean I was stockpiling "get out of photos free" cards to pull out and use in the future. I suppose I could argue the theory that taking a photo steals part of your soul, as some cultures believe... but then I guess I'd be resigning myself to the fact that I am slowly becoming soul-less, and probably will be completely devoid of all soul-ness when I reach 65...which doesn't sound like a very attractive retirement plan to me, when I sit down and think about it.

So I'm left with this fun little catch-22; having no valid excuse to use to avoid photos, and yet understanding that these moments in time are indeed fleeting, and I may never have the opportunity again to speak about pretzel prices or suit up and prance about, and should probably just allow the opportunities to be taken, before they're gone.

Besides, there's a hole in my Grandfather's logic...being Dutch, what ON EARTH is he doing PAYING for having photos taken? Shouldn't he be ecstatic at all the free photo ops he can get his hands on?

So... understand their value? Yes. 

Love taking them? Yes. 

Admit that sometimes they turn out great despite the fact that I'm in them? Okay. 

Love being in them? Well...

My name is Sam, and I dislike being in photos.